Today is the day after The Greatest International Scavenger Hunt the World Has Ever Seen. We ran all week like-a the cr-r-r-r-r-azy people that you know we are.
Superhero Doing a Menial Household Chore.
The Constitution in common language as street art
Notes from the Parking Salutations Bureau.
Some sort of futuristic self-portrait kinda thing.
The episode in which I take Grantley out so P can sleep in and
we encounter a crackhead in the courtyard.
Something about how you are working on regressing back to a happy time during your childhood.
Volunteering with a Veterans Group
Fixing something that's driving you crazy in your town.
Posing next to the grave of someone who died from a smoking related illness.
That's my mad face. Try to avoid that. FYI
This was do something nice to make others happy so it's blankets for doggies.
(There are 2 more but they're movies. Some other time perhaps.)
And all of this, brings us up to this moment.
The task was to something that you've always wanted to do, but were too scared to do it. My very, very first thought was skateboarding but the truth us, I had tried it about 10 years ago and I ended up flat on the floor of my kitchen with a gigantic bruise on my arm. BOOM.
I kinda didn't realize the board could go backward AND forward and it flew out from under me. I was teaching at The American Academy of Art at that time and I was never sure if my students thought I was cool or an idiot. Let's hope for a bit of both-possibly maybe. But anyway, my second thought was surfing.
I've ALWAYS wanted to try surfing. Not like Hawaii 5-O or anything. I just kinda wanted to paddle around and try it.
And now you say, umm hello? There's no ocean in Chicagoland and I say to you: Third Coast Surfing. And from here on out, in this adventure, it's going to be me nearly going out of my way to make sure it's not going to work out because I am actually scared.
I'm scared because my belly has a tear in the fascia and because of that, I can't do any ab work(not even the baby crunches)or lift more that 10 pounds so I am mush and I'm afraid I'm not strong enough(In my middle) to save my sorry ass in case that comes up. (I respect horses and major bodies of water among other big things. (And for the record, my shoulders, back and arms are strong like bull and I have some cool new dance grooves cuzza Zumba.))
I started Facebook messengering with that business. Like hey hi, it wouldn't be possible for me to let's say, show up on Thursday and play around on a surfboard, would it? And then I don't open their reply right away because I am scared.
But yeah, they have boards for rent-20 bucks for 4 hours. That is(unfortunately to my secret plan of having this fall through)within my current fun budget.
And I write back and say, something like, well, I've had cancer twice this year and I have a hernia so are you sure this is something I can do?
Who do I ask for?
Anyone should be able to help you.
In the meantime, someone in a far off nation(on my team)has picked up that task. Please please please, I type, can I have that one?(Eventho I'd have been secretly fine to have an official out.)
Yes, she'll let me have it.
Had to get the day off. Extreme last minute. Text my magical supervisor. She makes it happen.
Had to convince P. He's been working nights and running on very little sleep and here's me going: please please please can we go? It will be my early early birthday present.
He agrees. (yipes)
We get to the Surf Shop. It looks like Serious Business. Right away, I knew it was a place where the likes of me did not belong. It was kinda like a stereo store or a men's pipe shoppe. Not happy or amusing or plastic wiggley dashboard hula girls at all.
I was for SURE gonna buy a t-shirt? Like as a prize for bravery? Uhhhnope. The whole place was kinda dark and-I dunno-dignified? (I don't think they'd even want me to wear one of their shirts. ha ha ha.)
I explained who I was and the young girl had no clue so okay. And....this was really weird, but there was a woman who seemed to be the manager and she...well, she asked if I wanted a lesson. Lessons were 75 bucks and I knew-strength-wise I'd be worthless at this point. So I declined and she said I could rent a board and I filled out the paper and she went to get it and she came out with this huge board and she said, okay you have to tie this cord around your ankle. And I thought: no.
I said, ummm. Do you think we could buy one of these little boards? We had noticed one on our way in for like $16.99. The young girl said we'd have to get a bigger one. And I'm kinda like....uh huh....uhhhh do you think we could sorta play around with something like that instead? Just to start?
Sure they say and the tore up the release form and took my $26 bucks and allowed me to select which one I preferred(I went with dolphin+fishies)and off we went to the beach.
We got there and the red flags were up. There was a sign and it said:
Waist Deep Only. Flag: Red. And another sign said: Very Dangerous RIP Conditions.
So there's me, standing there for a long long time, thinking it over.
And finally, finally, finally I went in.
I actually went in twice. In between, I watched a skinny little boy play with his neon green boogie board. He wasn't worried about losing his prescription sunglasses so I got rid of mine. He was all about the work that is fun. It took me about 25 minutes to absorb his groove and that's exactly when I started to play.